Homsar Redux
by Shwoo
Summary: A quick rewrite of someone else's fanfiction.


This is a rewrite of a fanfic written by The Homsar Floater, which is short enough to repost right now:

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[Homsar emoticon] [love emoticon] and [Strong Sad emoticon] [happy emoticon] have a problem with [Strong Bad emoticon] [angry emoticon]

Homsar was with Strong Sad for no reason. But then Strong Sad looked around and it turned out they were in space. Then Strong Sad left once Strong Bad was there.

The Strong Sad says: Each day we die a little more.

Yes, that was exactly what Strong Sad said. He left. Then [Homestar emoticon] [smiling emoticon] , [Stinkoman emoticon] [sunglasses emoticon], [Strong Mad emoticon] [sad emoticon], and [Trogdor emoticon] [tongue sticking out emoticon] arrived. Stinkoman came from a 20x6 portal. Strong Mad took the lappy as Homsar distracted Strong Sad. Then Homestar, Stinkoman , and Strong Mad beat up [Strong Bad emoticon]. Trogdor BURNiNATED the Lappy! Note: StrongBad brought the lappy to space!

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That story belongs to The Homsar Floater, not me. I am not trying to stake any claim over it with this rewrite, just like I'm not trying to stake any claim over the Brothers Chaps' characters by writing Homestar Runner fanfiction. I also mean no offense to The Homsar Floater. I just thought it would be fun to rewrite their story.

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Homsar and Strong Sad had a problem with Strong Bad. Actually, what Homsar had said was "AaAaAaAaAh! I'm a cube shaped diagonal merchant!", but Strong Sad was pretty sure that meant "Strong Bad is a huge jerk and should stop picking on Strong Sad, who deserves much better than the life he was handed".

"I agree," Strong Sad told Homsar, then glanced around and noticed that they were in space. "Whaaaat?"

Strong Bad entered the room. In space. This is the kind of space where you can walk in a total vacuum. "Do either of you two losers know why we're suddenly in space, and uh... how come we're breathing instead of exploding into a huge cloud of bloody chunks?"

As his brother spoke, Strong Sad's pupils dilated until his eyes looked twice their normal size. "Each day we die a little more," he mumbled, wandering away into the blackness.

"Uh... that was weird," said Strong Bad, looking around.

"Okay, okay," said Homestar, appearing out of thin vacuum with a pop. "Either I took a wrong turn back at the office parking lot, or the atmosphere just got its pink slip."

"Homestar—" began Strong Bad.

A portal, which was clearly labelled "20X6", opened behind Homestar. Stinkoman came out, looked around, and said "What is this, some kind of outer space chaaaaalllleeeenge?" Then he started beating up the nothingness.

Homestar nodded, as the portal closed. "Yeah, it is. That patch of space was looking at you funny."

"_Stinko_—" began Strong Bad again, but was interrupted when Trogdor appeared and roared. "Wah!"

It was almost a relief that the last person to mysteriously appear was Strong Mad, who looked around, said "I DON'T LIKE OUTER SPACE!", and covered his eyes.

Strong Bad wondered if he and maybe Strong Mad were going to mysteriously appear back home anytime soon, because he was beginning to crave some fast food.

Then Homsar suddenly floated two inches from his face, yelling. Strong Bad realised that he was inexplicably holding his Lappy just as it was yanked out of his hands. "What the crap?!"

Homsar floated away, just as Homestar, Stinkoman and Strong Mad jumped Strong Bad and started beating him up. Strong Bad caught a glimpse of their eyes, and they were as large and strange looking as Strong Sad's had been. "Ahh! No! Quit beating me up! Quit it!" But somehow he couldn't fight back. He felt as weak as he did when someone woke him up before noon.

Trogdor approached the Lappy, which had been dropped a short distance away, and Strong Bad watched helplessly as he burninated it, leaving nothing but ashes.

"Lappy! No!" said Strong Bad, and screamed.

"Strong Bad..." said the Lappy. "Strong Bad, wake up!"

Someone shook him, and the whole scene dissolved into nothingness. Strong Bad opened his eyes.

He was in his basement, lying on the couch. And nobody was beating him up. He didn't even feel any more bruised than he'd expect from sleeping on a half-full bag of chips. Strong Sad was standing over him. For the first time in many years, Strong Bad was glad to see him, so he shook his head until the feeling went away.

"Were you having a nightmare?" said Strong Sad.

"Uh, _no_" said Strong Bad, noticing as he spoke that his throat hurt. "Only lame, bed-wetting kid brothers get nightmares."

"Then why were you screaming? I could hear you from my room."

Strong Bad tried to think, which was difficult so early in the morning. "I was screaming 'cause I... was having so much fun. Me and all my... legions of adoring fans with good spelling and grammar. We were on a mountain. You know, one of those echo mountains where you have to yell, and it echoes..."

"Okay, whatever," said Strong Sad. He turned to leave. "I'm gonna go figure out how Strong Mad always sleeps through your bad dreams."

Strong Bad didn't get back to sleep for a long time.


End file.
